I'm not complaining

Only jerks get tattoos?

When people see my tattoo(s), they ask me about them, and one of two things happens.

If they have tattoos, they just say “cool.”

If they don’t have any tattoos, they tell me a story about how they saw someone who was covered in tattoos. A painter who worked on their house, or someone they met on a vacation. Then they say how the person turned out to be the nicest person ever. As though only rude people get tattoos. They tell me this, and I don’t know why. Because I have tattoos, and I’m nice. I’m not going to be surprised that they found someone else who has them and didn’t bite their face off.

Tell them I say hi, though.

Not to rag on a mom, but….

I saw a bumper sticker, and only because the car pulled an illegal u-turn at a stoplight did I not follow them home if only to photograph the bumper sticker. So since I don’t have the picture, I’ll just describe it. It read,

“Proud ___________ of Ms. Missouri.”

In that blank, written in permanent marker was “daughter.”

That’s right. Some woman is so concieted, that she not only participates in beauty pageants to begin with, but forces her daughter to promote those minor achievements on the back of her car.

#1 contestant, but not quite #1 mom…

(because MY mom is #1!!!)

Argue-by-Number (Not Funny)

I had a profound realization tonight and it got me thinking. However, it’s not a closed case. I want an answer. Please weigh in. via responses, comments, or even email. I am honestly curious.

To make it easier to argue, I’m numbering my more bold statements/assumptions. Feel free to use them as reference when debunking my thoughts.

Conservatives can’t be good Christians.

(1) While not all Christians are conservatives, it’s not a stretch to say that most conservatives are Christians.

This is what bothered me. After I thought about it, conservative thought and christian thought are not the same. Quite the opposite. Yet God continues to be cited as conservatives attack progressive moves in healthcare, immigration, taxes, and other fun political topics. 

I was at a unique church service tonight. Which is odd. I’m not a faithful church-goer. I only attend when I’m asked to play guitar or bass. I don’t pray. I don’t ask for God’s guidance in life decisions. However, I still believe in God. That aside, I was at a service tonight where we broke into groups to discuss things. The topic: “What is God’s will for humankind, and for you individually? Are they different?” John 6:40 says, “For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day.”

So we discussed and came to the agreement that (2) God’s will is that we all live in harmony with God. We share the word and treat each other in a way that pleases God, and we’ll get into heaven. This leads into the whole WWJD thing, service work, christian charities, giving to the poor, and missionaries taking food and medical supplies to 3rd world countries. We talked about starving people. Is it okay to steal food if you have no other options and have to feed your family? Is it more Christian-like to die a martyr without stealing in the name of living sin-free? (3) We agreed that an unspoken element here was the greed that forces people into these situations. Poverty and hunger exist even though we have the money and resources to get rid of them. If someone is choosing between stealing/eating or dying, a fellow christian should be there to help.

So we all felt good about these conclusions, and tossed around words like “altruism” and “Christian Community.” (4) It then hit me that the fundamentals of Christian teaching are a LOT like the democratic POV: (5) The rich should give to the poor. Not just money. Rich in knowledge, skills, or otherwise.

(6) So for a Christian/Conservative to travel to Uruguay to build houses and churches, but then tell desprate Mexicans to get out of our country seems contradictory.

(7) For a Christian/Conservative to give extra income to the offering plate, but say that a tax gradient isn’t a good idea, seems a little off.

(8) For a Christian/Conservative to donate any money or time to an unhealthy 3rd world country or adopt an unfortunate family during the holidays, but disagree with universal healthcare, seems fishy.

If anything, the United States is moving in a very Christian direction. In God We Trust. So we help our poor: We make sure even poor kids get an education (why not also make sure they can visit a doctor?). We fight for countries that aren’t strong enough to fight for themselves (ok, Pro-War is conservative). We also have welfare programs in place to help people who are having a rough go at things.

So all this said, (9) how can a conservative argue against immigration, healthcare, and taxes? (They can have abortion: conservatives and christians can agree on that.)

What would Jesus do? (10) He wouldn’t deny healthcare to the poor. He wouldn’t say, “You have to earn it, even if you fell on hard times.” He loves everyone unconditionally. Those conditions including poor or privileged, sick or fit. Shouldn’t conservatives too (If they want to call themselves goo Christians.

I say this because I really can’t see how the two can coexist. If anyone can offer some insight to how the basic Christian Principles can live in harmony with Conservative thought, please let me know. If I went astray on one of my points, cite it to make things easier.

Thanks.

Why I NEED an iPad.

Just like Obama, everyone has thoughts about the iPad. Some think it’s going to change the world, others think it’s useless. Everyone has specific reasons for this. The supporters cite its size, potential, features, and innovation. The Nay-sayers push it’s limitations in the world of flash, inability to make phone calls, and the I-have-a-phone-and-a-laptop-what-do-I-need-this-for. I can argue both sides, but am slowly losing my mind waiting for mine to arrive. I am one person who truly has a NEED for this product.

Right now, as a salesman and account manager for my own business, I end up making a lot of presentations that highlight features of our own websites and videos that we create. A major limitation has been that if I’m in a place where there is no WIFI, I cannot show websites. Many of my clients struggle with computers (hence their need for us in the first place), and their offices have no wireless. At times like this, I have to take screenshots of websites that we’ve made. No fun pop ups, or java animations. No clicking videos or links. No showing how easy it is for us to update things on the fly. Videos also prove difficult to showcase as I must bring my production computer out of the office and into the wild. While this isn’t a huge inconvenience, it’s makes me a little nervous because I am terrified of crashes. 

So, give me a device that grabs the internet wherever I am, has a solid state hard drive which can handle the rigors of travel, can show full websites (we don’t program in flash), can show videos and even stream them without leaving the page, and can get over 10 hours of battery unlike the 4 my laptop can squeeze.

Add to that the touch interface and beauty of the device. In the technology world, sales can be tricky. If you’re claiming to develop cutting edge websites and content, pulling out a ThinkPad from 2001 leaves a certain impression. Having a slick, beautiful device that will allow my clients to TOUCH their websites and experience an interface that they haven’t before will give me an edge. The speed of the device and it’s reputation as a magical and revolutionary device will subconsciously reflect in them onto me.

I have a 2nd laptop that I use at home right now for email and surfing the web. I also check my calendar on it and take short notes. When I go to meetings, i take a small paper notebook/journal that I use for notes. If this device can improve my presentations, replace a computer, and play games, I welcome it into my life.

So I wait. I check my order status a few times a day, and look forward to the day it gets here.

A snapshot into my selective diligence:

Today, I did the following:

-Updated Clients facebooks and websites over 15 times.
-Checked my iPad order status 3 times.
-Took my dog out 5 times.
-Visited 2 clients at their offices.
-Checked my email over 25 times.
-Fed all my pets twice.
-Talked to mom twice, dad once, and older brother twice.
-Poured myself 3 glasses of tea.
-Charged my phone.

However, I also washed a load of socks. For the third time. Because I keep washing them, then forgetting to put them in the dryer. For a week. So today, after I had begun wearing pants, because I had no more short socks, I dried my socks. Still need to go downstairs and get them, though… Maybe I’ll rock sandals tomorrow.